Let me begin by thanking the hundreds of you who have taken time out of your busy schedules to call, text, e-mail, Facebook, etc your support after the events of this past Friday. I am humbled to have such a large network of support and prayers during this tough time.
At this point the biggest hurdle is overcoming the emotional aspects of what happened. Twice now in the past few days loud and unexpected noises have sent my heart racing. One was a gunshot on TV and the other is funny now that I think back on it. Yesterday as we were setting up for church, I was bent over hooking up a light when our drummer decided to begin his warm up. He started with just a single hit on the snare drum and that set off somewhat of a panic attack. I had to leave the theater we meet in and walk around the lobby areas to calm down. So thankful that Chad was there to talk me through it and pray with me.
I really wasn’t planning on talking about the incident much in yesterday’s message but when I got up to speak I was a complete mess. I was crying harder than a 14 year old girl at a One Direction concert. Finally I was able to compose myself and preach what I know is something God really wanted everyone to hear.
I have decided though that this week as we wrap-up our “Don’t Waste Your Life” series that I’m going to scrap what was planned and instead talk in more detail about the events on Friday and some of the spiritual lessons that can be learned from it. I think it will be therapeutic for me and my prayer is that people can learn from my experience without having to go through it yourself.
In the meantime, keep praying for all involved. From what I understand the 2 shooting victims will be fine. Keep praying for our police who are greatly under-staffed. And I do appreciate your continued prayers for me as I continue, with Jesus help, processing all that happened. Last night I finally got a good night’s sleep…in fact I slept 10+ hours…that felt good. Also, I’ve been praying a lot and from having done so much counseling myself I can see the symptoms in myself like, PTSD, irrational fear, etc, so I’m going to call a counselor friend of mine to see how we might speed up the emotional healing.
Hope to see you on Sunday as I share more. Paraphrasing the words of Joseph in the Old Testament, “I want to take what Satan meant for evil and turn it around and use it for good!”
thanks for sharing this Gilbert. I appreciate your honesty and transparency
Melissa just noted that you’re personally experiencing a degree of PSTD you’ll be a much BETTER counselor to others. While not the same thing, she said she has much more compassion for single mothers due to the 3 yrs she was one. It reminded me of the Sermon Illustration:
MOLDING A MAN
When God wants to drill a man,
And thrill a man, And skill a man,
When God wants to mold a man
To play the noblest part;
When He yearns with all His heart.
To create so great and bold a man
That all the world shall be amazed,
Watch His methods, watch His ways!
How He ruthlessly perfects
Whom He royally elects!
How He hammers him and hurts him,
And with mighty blows converts him
Into trial shapes of clay which
Only God understands;
While his tortured heart is crying
And he lifts beseeching hands!
How He bends but never breaks
When his good He undertakes;
How He uses whom He chooses,
And with every purpose fuses him;
By every act induces him
To try His splendor out—
God knows what He’s about!
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